The Zach vs. Nate Story [as told by ko.com]

Starks

Starter
Ever did one those writing excerises where you say something and the next person continues the story. This could be a hilarious thread. Let's see what you guys can come up with. I'll start

....Knicks Lockeroom after game....

Zeke: What's wrong with you two?

Nate: [staring at the ground smiling]

Zach: I don't know what he smiling for...he think he run shit here just cause he gets burn. I used to eat lil punks like him for breakfast.

Nate: ......
 

nyKnicks126

Go 1990s New York Knicks!
I can just see the way Z Bo said that lol!!!

I think he eats more then lil prunks like Nate Robinson, I guess Z Bo is jealous of the skills Nate has, and what he doesnt!!!

HBO PAY PER VIEW FIGHT
Nate Robinson
nate_robinson.png


VS
Zach Randolph aka The Punk Eater
PMugshot__Zach-Randolph.jpg

zach_randolph.jpg


I got my money on Nate Robinson beating Zach Randolph up.

Previous results Nate Robinson vs JR Smith

10556123_240X180.jpg


Nate>>JR
 

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
Ever did one those writing excerises where you say something and the next person continues the story. This could be a hilarious thread. Let's see what you guys can come up with. I'll start

....Knicks Lockeroom after game....

Zeke: What's wrong with you two?

Nate: [staring at the ground smiling]

Zach: I don't know what he smiling for...he think he run shit here just cause he gets burn. I used to eat lil punks like him for breakfast.

Nate: ......

Nate: Im gonna take you down like i took JR smith down chubs!!!

Zach: Im gonna munch you down the same way I munch Burger King down before games, lil punk bitch!!!!

Zeke: Enough guys!!! Zach, Im gonna start making you the new scapegoat instead of marbury!!!! Now i gotta go check to see if this Vince Carter trade is going to fall through, but first I have to go talk to Jamal real quick, is he still in the shower?

Nate: ......
 

Starks

Starter
Nate: Im gonna take you down like i took JR smith down chubs!!!

Zach: Im gonna munch you down the same way I munch Burger King down before games, lil punk bitch!!!!

Zeke: Enough guys!!! Zach, Im gonna start making you the new scapegoat instead of marbury!!!! Now i gotta go check to see if this Vince Carter trade is going to fall through, but first I have to go talk to Jamal real quick, is he still in the shower?

Nate: ......

Zach: Fuk that. I'm sick of this place. Get me outa here. Where's that shorty at that gets me room rentals?

Knicks PR guy: You mean Nancy? Ummm... Actually I think it would be in our best interest if I just help you.

Zach: get my agent on the cellie. I'm done wit ya scrub ass punks
 
Last edited:

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
Zach: Fuk that. I'm sick of this place. Get me outa here. Where's that shorty at that gets me room rentals?

Knicks PR guy: You mean Nancy? Ummm... Actually I think it would be in our best interest if I just help you.

Zach: get my agent on the cellie. I'm down wit ya scub ass punks

Zachs Agent: I keep tellin Isiah you want a trade out of NY, I think hes lost his mind. He keeps saying over and over again "its the fans fault."

Jared Jeffries: You see what you and Nate have done to him!!!

Zach: shut up scrub, at least i can score. You look like a giraffe, all tall and skinny, Ill fuk yo ass up after i step on Nate!!!

David Lee: I got Jareds back!!!

Zach: Stay out of this white boy!!!

Malik Rose: Who are you callin a white boy?

Zach: ........no one. Eddy said it

Nate: Hes not even here, hes at Burger King.

Zach: Why didnt he invite me and Jerome?

Nate: Jeromes with him.
 

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
zach: (tears start to form in his eyes) well they, how come, we always go to Burger King together. Why didnt they invite me?

Isiah: Because you have been traded, pillsbury dough boy. Pack up you bags, we sent you, balkman, and our 1st round pick to New Jersey for Vince Carter. I am a genious.

Malik Rose: No, you are a moron

Rest of team: co-sign

(Isiah goes to join Crawford in the shower)

Q-Rich: so whens this fight goin down, im gettin hyped

Zach: as soon as Nate whos not so great is ready

Nate: I was born ready chubbs

Zach: arite, lets go. Im gonna f*ck you up!!!!!
 

LJ4ptplay

Starter
Zachs Agent: I keep tellin Isiah you want a trade out of NY, I think hes lost his mind. He keeps saying over and over again "its the fans fault."

Jared Jeffries: You see what you and Nate have done to him!!!

Zach: shut up scrub, at least i can score. You look like a giraffe, all tall and skinny, Ill fuk yo ass up after i step on Nate!!!

David Lee: I got Jareds back!!!

Zach: Stay out of this white boy!!!

Malik Rose: Who are you callin a white boy?

Zach: ........no one. Eddy said it

Nate: Hes not even here, hes at Burger King.

Zach: Why didnt he invite me and Jerome?

Nate: Jeromes with him.

zach: (tears start to form in his eyes) well they, how come, we always go to Burger King together. Why didnt they invite me?

Isiah: Because you have been traded, pillsbury dough boy. Pack up you bags, we sent you, balkman, and our 1st round pick to New Jersey for Vince Carter. I am a genious.

Malik Rose: No, you are a moron

Rest of team: co-sign

(Isiah goes to join Crawford in the shower)

Q-Rich: so whens this fight goin down, im gettin hyped

Zach: as soon as Nate whos not so great is ready

Nate: I was born ready chubbs

Zach: arite, lets go. Im gonna f*ck you up!!!!!

Brilliant!! Funny as hell!!
 

abcd

KnicksonLIN.com
Nate: Im gonna take you down like i took JR smith down chubs!!!

Zach: Im gonna munch you down the same way I munch Burger King down before games, lil punk bitch!!!!

Zeke: Enough guys!!! Zach, Im gonna start making you the new scapegoat instead of marbury!!!! Now i gotta go check to see if this Vince Carter trade is going to fall through, but first I have to go talk to Jamal real quick, is he still in the shower?

Nate: ......
LOL! That was the funniest post up to date! That gets my vote for funniest post of the year.The funny thing is that Isiah probably does all of those things. Isiah is just like a corrupt politician.
 

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
zach: (tears start to form in his eyes) well they, how come, we always go to Burger King together. Why didnt they invite me?

Isiah: Because you have been traded, pillsbury dough boy. Pack up you bags, we sent you, balkman, and our 1st round pick to New Jersey for Vince Carter. I am a genious.

Malik Rose: No, you are a moron

Rest of team: co-sign

(Isiah goes to join Crawford in the shower)

Q-Rich: so whens this fight goin down, im gettin hyped

Zach: as soon as Nate whos not so great is ready

Nate: I was born ready chubbs

Zach: arite, lets go. Im gonna f*ck you up!!!!!

1 minute later.......

q-rich: do you think hes gonna be ok?

Fred Jones: Damn he got hit harder then Mardy did by Carmello

Mardy Collins: Why do you guys keep bringin that up, you know im sensitive about that

Nate: Im 2-0, whos next?

Q-Rich: Hes still not moving

Jeffries: dump some water on him

(Water is dumped on Z-Bo)

Nate: Damn he still knocked the f*ck out

(Curry enters with a present in his hand)

Curry: I heard my buddy Zach got traded, where is he?

Malik Rose: Nate snuffed his ass, he still out cold

Curry: damn, maybe if I open up this box the smell will wake him up

(Curry opens box, with a quadruple whopper in it)

(Zach sniffs a couple of times and finally sits up)

Z-Bo: I smell a whopper!!!!

Curry: Here you go, me and Jerome will miss you!!!!

Z-Bo: We'll hang out in the offseason all the time, what the hell happened to me?

Q-Rich: Nate whooped your ass kid

Z-Bo: damn, you guys wont tell anyone, rite?

Q-rich: F*ck you, its not like you were ever part of the trade

Z-Bo: Stop picking on me

(Isiah and Crawford enter, holding hands)

Q-Rich: Dwight said you was suckin d*ck

Crawford: Dwight who, Howard?

Q-Rich: Da white around yo lips b*tch!!!!!

Isiah: what me and my son do stays between us, we dont need that Q. Ive never seen a regression as bad as yours, from one year to the next.

Q-Rich: I have, you had a playoff team in 04. What happened in 05?

Isiah: Its Marburys fault!!!

Q-Rich: Marbury brought this team to the playoffs in 04, you made the trade for Crawford before the 05 season. Perhaps thats part of the reason why the Knicks didnt look to sharp.

Isiah: Are you trying to blame this on me and Jamal? dont you ever do that again, thats personal. Jamal is the best player on this team by far, and one of the best players in the league. You will be doin laps til sunrise if I catch you or anyone in this lockerroom talk like that again!!!!!

(Telephone rings)

Isiah: hello

Anucha Brown: Whatsup handsome

Isiah: nothin baby, I was just thinkin about you.

Anucha: Im always thinking about you, we put together some scheme to rob MSG!!! Now that were both rich as f*ck, once Dolan fires you lets go buy a small island.

Isiah: im down, baby. Me, you, and Jamal!!!

Anucha: Will you stop this obsession with him, hes not your son!!!!!

Isiah: We cant go through this rite now, the whole team is here with me. i dont want them to figure out what were talking about.

Anucha: Ok ill talk to you later sexy, Ill be wearin your favorite panties when you arrive home tonight!!

Isiah: Just make sure you dont put mine on this time, you stretched them out last time. see you later

Q-Rich: what was that all about?
 
1 minute later.......

q-rich: do you think hes gonna be ok?

Fred Jones: Damn he got hit harder then Mardy did by Carmello

Mardy Collins: Why do you guys keep bringin that up, you know im sensitive about that

Nate: Im 2-0, whos next?

Q-Rich: Hes still not moving

Jeffries: dump some water on him

(Water is dumped on Z-Bo)

Nate: Damn he still knocked the f*ck out

(Curry enters with a present in his hand)

Curry: I heard my buddy Zach got traded, where is he?

Malik Rose: Nate snuffed his ass, he still out cold

Curry: damn, maybe if I open up this box the smell will wake him up

(Curry opens box, with a quadruple whopper in it)

(Zach sniffs a couple of times and finally sits up)

Z-Bo: I smell a whopper!!!!

Curry: Here you go, me and Jerome will miss you!!!!

Z-Bo: We'll hang out in the offseason all the time, what the hell happened to me?

Q-Rich: Nate whooped your ass kid

Z-Bo: damn, you guys wont tell anyone, rite?

Q-rich: F*ck you, its not like you were ever part of the trade

Z-Bo: Stop picking on me

(Isiah and Crawford enter, holding hands)

Q-Rich: Dwight said you was suckin d*ck

Crawford: Dwight who, Howard?

Q-Rich: Da white around yo lips b*tch!!!!!

Isiah: what me and my son do stays between us, we dont need that Q. Ive never seen a regression as bad as yours, from one year to the next.

Q-Rich: I have, you had a playoff team in 04. What happened in 05?

Isiah: Its Marburys fault!!!

Q-Rich: Marbury brought this team to the playoffs in 04, you made the trade for Crawford before the 05 season. Perhaps thats part of the reason why the Knicks didnt look to sharp.

Isiah: Are you trying to blame this on me and Jamal? dont you ever do that again, thats personal. Jamal is the best player on this team by far, and one of the best players in the league. You will be doin laps til sunrise if I catch you or anyone in this lockerroom talk like that again!!!!!

(Telephone rings)

Isiah: hello

Anucha Brown: Whatsup handsome

Isiah: nothin baby, I was just thinkin about you.

Anucha: Im always thinking about you, we put together some scheme to rob MSG!!! Now that were both rich as f*ck, once Dolan fires you lets go buy a small island.

Isiah: im down, baby. Me, you, and Jamal!!!

Anucha: Will you stop this obsession with him, hes not your son!!!!!

Isiah: We cant go through this rite now, the whole team is here with me. i dont want them to figure out what were talking about.

Anucha: Ok ill talk to you later sexy, Ill be wearin your favorite panties when you arrive home tonight!!

Isiah: Just make sure you dont put mine on this time, you stretched them out last time. see you later

Q-Rich: what was that all about?
(Jim Dolan walks in the room)

Isiah: Hey buddy, whats going on?

Dolan: Isiah, who was that you were talking to on the phone?

Isiah: Ummmm uhh it was..... the GM of the Heat. I uhh traded for this guy named umm Jason Williams. He's got an expiring contract! I only gave up David Lee, Nate, and Fred Jones. And guess what Jimmy, best of all, this guys white!

Dolan: Expiring contracts. Hmmmmm, I heard something about those things on TV once. Great Job Isiah! I was just coming in here to fire you because of all the death threats i was getting from people. But it's okay now, I'll just send a letter back saying that Isiah got us an "extriering contract". See you later my man.

Isiah: Okay, peace home slice.

Dolan: Pardon me?

Isiah: I mean, good day sir.

(Dolan walks out)

Nate: Nice Job dumbass!! He's gunna be dead by tonight!. And I KNOW i'm not getting traded, or your ass is next. (Nate takes off his shirt.)

Jamal: Daddy stop it. You know he can hurt you. And if you get hurt, then no more...

Isiah: SHUT UP SON!

Jamal: Oh yeah, that's secret.

Lee: Nate, PLEASE just kill him already! I'm tired of playin for his crazy ass.

(Zach throws water at Isiah)

Zach: BITCHHHH! How did that feel?

Nate: How many times do i have to tell you? THAT DOES NOT HURT!!!

Isiah: Zach that was not acceptable. I'm going to have to...

Zach: YOUR NOT THE F*CKIN BOSS OF ME NO MORE. AHHHHHHHHH

(Zach jumps on Isiah)
(Nate throws towel at Zach)

Nate: YO get the f*ck off of him. His ass is mine!

(Nate joins in on the assault)

Jamal: Waaaah! Daddy do something!
 
(Jim Dolan walks in the room)

Isiah: Hey buddy, whats going on?

Dolan: Isiah, who was that you were talking to on the phone?

Isiah: Ummmm uhh it was..... the GM of the Heat. I uhh traded for this guy named umm Jason Williams. He's got an expiring contract! I only gave up David Lee, Nate, and Fred Jones. And guess what Jimmy, best of all, this guys white!

Dolan: Expiring contracts. Hmmmmm, I heard something about those things on TV once. Great Job Isiah! I was just coming in here to fire you because of all the death threats i was getting from people. But it's okay now, I'll just send a letter back saying that Isiah got us an "extriering contract". See you later my man.

Isiah: Okay, peace home slice.

Dolan: Pardon me?

Isiah: I mean, good day sir.

(Dolan walks out)

Nate: Nice Job dumbass!! He's gunna be dead by tonight!. And I KNOW i'm not getting traded, or your ass is next. (Nate takes off his shirt.)

Jamal: Daddy stop it. You know he can hurt you. And if you get hurt, then no more...

Isiah: SHUT UP SON!

Jamal: Oh yeah, that's secret.

Lee: Nate, PLEASE just kill him already! I'm tired of playin for his crazy ass.

(Zach throws water at Isiah)

Zach: BITCHHHH! How did that feel?

Nate: How many times do i have to tell you? THAT DOES NOT HURT!!!

Isiah: Zach that was not acceptable. I'm going to have to...

Zach: YOUR NOT THE F*CKIN BOSS OF ME NO MORE. AHHHHHHHHH

(Zach jumps on Isiah)
(Nate throws towel at Zach)

Nate: YO get the f*ck off of him. His ass is mine!

(Nate joins in on the assault)

Jamal: Waaaah! Daddy do something!

Q-Rich: Yo lemme get in this!. Wate i gotta warm up first.

(Quentin jogs over to his locker where he starts throwin combos at a Paul Pierce cardboard figure)

Q: A'ight i'm ready!

(Q picks Isiah up by his neck, throws him down and messes his face up bad)

(Stephon Marbury walks in)

Steph: Hey guys what up? oh shit NICE JOB GUYS! i guess i missed a lot when i was f-ckin anucha, i mean rehabbing....
 

nyKnicks126

Go 1990s New York Knicks!
Q-Rich: Yo lemme get in this!. Wate i gotta warm up first.

(Quentin jogs over to his locker where he starts throwin combos at a Paul Pierce cardboard figure)

Q: A'ight i'm ready!

(Q picks Isiah up by his neck, throws him down and messes his face up bad)

(Stephon Marbury walks in)

Steph: Hey guys what up? oh shit NICE JOB GUYS! i guess i missed a lot when i was f-ckin anucha, i mean rehabbing....


The last part was really funny! We should make a real movie about this! lol.
 
Q-Rich: Yo lemme get in this!. Wate i gotta warm up first.

(Quentin jogs over to his locker where he starts throwin combos at a Paul Pierce cardboard figure)

Q: A'ight i'm ready!

(Q picks Isiah up by his neck, throws him down and messes his face up bad)

(Stephon Marbury walks in)

Steph: Hey guys what up? oh shit NICE JOB GUYS! i guess i missed a lot when i was f-ckin anucha, i mean rehabbing....

Q: THAT'S IT IMA END THIS SHIT!

(Q pulls an AK outta his pants)

Isiah: Quentin you don't have to do this.

Jamal: Wahhh Wahhhhh daddy noooo!!!

Steph: (smiling) Oh Shit!

Jared Jefferies: AHHHHH EVERBODY RUN!! HE'S GOT A GUN!!

Nate: somebody smack his crazy ass.^^^^

Q: Everybody shut the hell up!!! Ima end this!!

(Q-Rich grips the gun with 2 hands and pulls the trigger half way.)

Q: OWWWWWWWW MY BACK OWWWW!!!!!
 
Last edited:

Starks

Starter
Chandler: Hi my name is Wilson Chandler. We might not have met before, but you guys drafted me.

Morris: Yea me to, I'm the doofy guy on the bench.
 

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
Q: THAT'S IT IMA END THIS SHIT!

(Q pulls an AK outta his pants)

Isiah: Quentin you don't have to do this.

Jamal: Wahhh Wahhhhh daddy noooo!!!

Steph: (smiling) Oh Shit!

Jared Jefferies: AHHHHH EVERBODY RUN!! HE'S GOT A GUN!!

Nate: somebody smack his crazy ass.

Q: Everybody shut the hell up!!! Ima end this!!

(Q-Rich grips the gun with 2 hands and pulls the trigger half way.)

Q: OWWWWWWWW MY BACK OWWWW!!!!!

Chandler: Hi my name is Wilson Chandler. We might not have met before, but you guys drafted me.

Morris: Yea me to, I'm the doofy guy on the bench.

Nate: Who invited you guys here?

Chandler: Were part of the team, were just always on the bench

Nate: Were gonna have to see some ID

Morris: Isiah never plays us but I swear were part of the team

Herb Williams: C'mon guys, we have bigger problems rite now. Q through his back out again. Get the doctor here immediately!!!

Starbury: That back went out at the worst time, I was about to get my wish!!! Wheres that intern bitch at?

The Intern: Im rite here Steph, lets head to your truck!!!!!

(Balkman enters rite before they leave)

Balkman: Hey Steph, havent seen you in a long time

Starbury: I been tryin to stay away from the chaos!!!! Shit was stressin me out. I cant stand bein around these dumb ass mothaf*ckaz!!!

Balkman: co-sign. After you F*ck the intern lets go smoke a blunt!!!!

Starbury: Yea Im down, hit me up

(Marbury leaves to go f*ck the intern)

Isiah: Well that was a frightning experience, luckily Q's bad back saved my life.

Jared Jeffries: More minutes for me!!!!!

Isiah: Exactly what i was thinkin, your overrated defensively and have ZERO offensive ability. My type of player, you got that starting job you always wanted!!!

Jeffries: Thanks!!!! Im thrilled to be.....

Balkman: Hold the F*ck up!!! How this giraffe look-a-like mothaf*cka gonna take the startin job? He cant make a layup.

Isiah: Your not exactly MR. offense either, stoner

Balkman: How the f*ck you gonna call me a stoner, im gonna beat your ass down punk bitch!!!

Isiah: I wont trade you if you do that, you dont wanna be stuck here forever, do you?

balkman: Good point, sorry.

Isiah: Thats more like it!!!

(Telephone Rings)

Isiah: hello

Paul Pierce: Is Q there?

Isiah: Hes threw his back out again, hes being examined rite now. Can i take a message?

Pierce: Tell him its Paul Pierce and ask him what he thinks of our bench now

Isiah: Q said he gonna whoop yo bitch ass

Pierce: Shit!!! I wasnt tryin to provoke a fight!!!

Isiah: Too late, hes pissed now!!

Pierce: Umm umm umm shit!!!! What should I do?

(Q's back is fixed, hes gets on the phone)

Q-Rich: You gonna get f*cked up Pierced pussy

Pierce: Well thats not a nice name to call me

Q-Rich: shut the f*ck up pussy!!! Come see me in the streets

Pierce: The streets, well how do you get there?

Q-Rich: Whered you grow up, in Greenwich or sumthin? Im gonna beat your lil rich boy ass up bitch.

Pierce: (cough) suck it bitch

Q-Rich: what was that?

Pierce: I said Fuck, itch. I have egsyma

Q-Rich: oh well so does my mother. They came out with this new cream for it, she says it works real good. Ill ask her what the name of it is, so I can help you out.........wait a minute......whoops, When i see you next you im gonna do more then just stab you bitch

Pierce: ?
 
Nate: Who invited you guys here?

Chandler: Were part of the team, were just always on the bench

Nate: Were gonna have to see some ID

Morris: Isiah never plays us but I swear were part of the team

Herb Williams: C'mon guys, we have bigger problems rite now. Q through his back out again. Get the doctor here immediately!!!

Starbury: That back went out at the worst time, I was about to get my wish!!! Wheres that intern bitch at?

The Intern: Im rite here Steph, lets head to your truck!!!!!

(Balkman enters rite before they leave)

Balkman: Hey Steph, havent seen you in a long time

Starbury: I been tryin to stay away from the chaos!!!! Shit was stressin me out. I cant stand bein around these dumb ass mothaf*ckaz!!!

Balkman: co-sign. After you F*ck the intern lets go smoke a blunt!!!!

Starbury: Yea Im down, hit me up

(Marbury leaves to go f*ck the intern)

Isiah: Well that was a frightning experience, luckily Q's bad back saved my life.

Jared Jeffries: More minutes for me!!!!!

Isiah: Exactly what i was thinkin, your overrated defensively and have ZERO offensive ability. My type of player, you got that starting job you always wanted!!!

Jeffries: Thanks!!!! Im thrilled to be.....

Balkman: Hold the F*ck up!!! How this giraffe look-a-like mothaf*cka gonna take the startin job? He cant make a layup.

Isiah: Your not exactly MR. offense either, stoner

Balkman: How the f*ck you gonna call me a stoner, im gonna beat your ass down punk bitch!!!

Isiah: I wont trade you if you do that, you dont wanna be stuck here forever, do you?

balkman: Good point, sorry.

Isiah: Thats more like it!!!

(Telephone Rings)

Isiah: hello

Paul Pierce: Is Q there?

Isiah: Hes threw his back out again, hes being examined rite now. Can i take a message?

Pierce: Tell him its Paul Pierce and ask him what he thinks of our bench now

Isiah: Q said he gonna whoop yo bitch ass

Pierce: Shit!!! I wasnt tryin to provoke a fight!!!

Isiah: Too late, hes pissed now!!

Pierce: Umm umm umm shit!!!! What should I do?

(Q's back is fixed, hes gets on the phone)

Q-Rich: You gonna get f*cked up Pierced pussy

Pierce: Well thats not a nice name to call me

Q-Rich: shut the f*ck up pussy!!! Come see me in the streets

Pierce: The streets, well how do you get there?

Q-Rich: Whered you grow up, in Greenwich or sumthin? Im gonna beat your lil rich boy ass up bitch.

Pierce: (cough) suck it bitch

Q-Rich: what was that?

Pierce: I said Fuck, itch. I have egsyma

Q-Rich: oh well so does my mother. They came out with this new cream for it, she says it works real good. Ill ask her what the name of it is, so I can help you out.........wait a minute......whoops, When i see you next you im gonna do more then just stab you bitch

Pierce: ?
ahah OMG i never laughed so hard in my life
 

MSGKnickz33

The Gold Mac
Great thread, very creative idea by Starks. He now has 3 free Starbury insults, with my guarentee not to respond.
 
Top